After supper was cleared away and cleaned up, they divided up the space for sleeping. Shmi took Anakin's bed with her son and had insisted that Padme take her bed. Padme didn't want to impose, especially when everyone else had to sleep on the hard floor with just blankets and mats for comfort, but Shmi wouldn't hear of a refusal.
Still, Padme couldn't sleep. She couldn't do more than a one brief message back to Captain Panaka - who was probably hating her choice to explore the city more than ever now that there was a sandstorm. But the message was hard to hear, because of the storm, and it wasn't informative anyways due to the deception she was trying to pull off. She felt no more comforted about the situation of her world than she did when they landed here.
She'd been given a small glass of water before going to sleep. She'd set it on ground when she was done with it, planning to return it to the kitchen in the morning. But she tossed and turned and finally decided to just use returning it to the kitchen has an excuse.
She didn't expect to find another person sitting at the table.
"Oh, I'm sorry," she said. "I didn't wake you did, I?"
He was just at the table, nursing a second cup of tea and being quiet. He heard - and felt - her moving around in there before she arrived and greeted her with a slight smile. "No." She hadn't at all. "I was just listening to the wind." And thinking. "Would you prefer tea to the water?" He can do that much for her and it may help with sleep, eventually.
"I would appreciate that," she said and accepted tea from him.
She felt unsure of what to say around Obi-Wan. The things said at dinner seemed quite personal. And from what she'd gathered, Obi-Wan and Master Jinn already knew each other. But not in a way that brought any of them joy to see each other again.
"I'm sorry if my question brought up unpleasant memories for you. I was only trying to understand this place better."
"You didn't. I'm sorry your perfectly reasonable questions started all of that, though. I'm not really sure you even got any answers out of it."
He sat back down once they both had the tea, one leg folded under him. It was the truth, really. The 'unpleasant' memories were mostly pleasant, in a paradoxical way, and they weren't her doing.
"I'm sorry about your planet and the delay in getting your Queen to the Senate."
"No. I'd enjoy the company, and I don't mind if you want to try the conversation that blew up around you again, either." Simple, quiet, honest and direct.
"Thank you," she said and took a seat opposite him.
"There's so much about the galaxy that I'm finding I didn't know. I've been off Naboo before, for humanitarian work with my father. And still Tatooine surprises me. How can the Republic just ignore the people in need here?"
"For the same reasons that the Jedi do," he said, now with much less bitterness. "Or that Qui-Gon resisted my request for him to get Anakin and Shmi out of here."
There is a small pause, before he tries to elaborate. "They are two people, balanced against the weight of Naboo and everyone there. Even scaled to all the slaves on Tatooine, against the need within the Republic and what Tatooine can offer in return--" He shrugs slightly but also sighs, tiredly. "It just isn't worth the resources for them to help when they will get little to nothing back."
Padme made a face, "I understand addressing the unjust occupation of a world." There was no argument there, her loyalty was to Naboo. "But I don't accept the value of sentient life is so little the Galactic Republic would ignore their rights. That is what the Republic is for, not profit. The Republic is supposed to use its resources to help people."
Padme wanted to get indignant, argue more, pour more passion into something because it would feel like doing something useful. And right now she felt very useless.
And for a brief second, this probably showed all over her face. But in a breath she'd schooled her features once again.
It did show and he honestly loved her just a little bit for it. He didn't even have to know her for that, because it was loving that spark of passion and idealism and ... freedom.
"Maybe when the situation on Naboo is better, your Queen can remind the Senate that Tatooine is out here. Meanwhile maybe help nudge Qui-Gon out of his tunnel vision. He's always been very... mission focused. Sometimes there are things happening outside the mission that are worth coming back to."
Padme wished there was something more concrete in Obi-Wan's request.
"As the Queen's handmaiden, I can assure you she will be appalled by the conditions of Tatooine and will do what she can." When you spoke about yourself like you were another person, it was easy to make those kinds of promises.
But even as the actual Queen of Naboo, the latter task seemed impossible.
"I can try. But I do not know what powers of persuasion you think I have over a Jedi. I may have even exhausted his grace by simply being here. He did not approve when the Queen sent me with him to find a part for our ship."
He laughs softly at that. "The reason I left the Jedi was because there was a mission that we had completed, but people I would not walk away from and leave in need. But there are ways. Primarily he'll need to believe that there is something to do with them. The Temple can't take them, and they obviously have no resources. Help him find those answers, if you can. If you can't - the effort matters."
He grinned, still a little... conflicted, but he had no doubt. "If he doesn't win, I will be very surprised. He's better than you can imagine." A pause and; "How old are you?"
"Because I'm dumping an awful lot on the shoulders of a child, and even if that's not uncommon and you have greater ones - it isn't really right, either."
He was more aware of 'child' and what it meant through Anakin.
"I have served Naboo almost ten years in various capacities," Padme said. "That's not unusual for Naboo. Isn't that also how the Jedi are structured? Doesn't service with the Jedi begin very young?" She didn't know a lot about the Jedi, but she'd made sure she'd been as informed as possible when she learned two Jedi were coming to assist with the crisis on Naboo.
"Yes. I was only a little younger than you when I chose to leave the Jedi." And that was definitely an adult decision with adult consequences. "But then I look at Anakin and it feels very different."
Padme smiles at that. Anakin did seem like a sweet child, with a bright disposition despite his life's situation. She just hoped they weren't taking the wrong chance on him.
She chewed over her next question until she'd worked up the courage to ask it.
"It's okay," he said, trying to reassure her before he answered. She hadn't overstepped, he wasn't upset. "I left the Jedi to stay on Melida/Daan to try to help their... teenagers and young people end their civil war. We got it done but we were all really young and the war took a toll on people and the planet. That made us an easy target for slavers. I spent three or four years in a collar bouncing around from owner to owner before I landed with someone... decent enough to take it off. I stayed with him until he died and managed to stay out of the collar because no one knew I could do anything with the Force at that point. Then here."
In short that was all of it, in a very condensed and frankly sanitized way. More than she had asked for, but he didn't want her to feel like she couldn't asked.
"I'm so sorry that happened to you," she said. What in this universe was the Republic doing- civil wars with child soldiers? Societies so destabilized they were preyed upon by slavers? What did the senators do in Coruscant if not help the galaxy they'd sworn to serve?
It was quite frustrating to think about.
So she focused on Obi-Wan instead.
"I have another personal question... How is it your fault that you're a slave?"
Maybe he shouldn't have reassured her quite so much, when she'd begun asking personal questions.
He stares at her a moment, and then sighs softly over the rim of his mug. "It isn't, not really. It is something that would not have occurred had I not argued with Qui-Gon and insisted upon staying when he left. As far as he is concerned that makes it some combination of my own doing and the 'Will Of The Force'- he may even consider it just. I need him to help Anakin. Aggressively claiming responsibility for it will get me further than another argument with him - and he isn't entirely wrong, in his belief."
Padme followed Obi-Wan's logic for the most part, though she didn't think Obi-Wan should have to suffer like that just to get Master Jinn to see reason.
She did not, however, agree with the Obi-Wan at the very end.
And she was starting to question the judgment of the Jedi, if they would make the conclusion that a slave is partially to blame for abuses done to them.
"Is Anakin's slave master Watto more culpable than the slavers who enslaved you?"
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2020-07-11 07:55 pm (UTC)Still, Padme couldn't sleep. She couldn't do more than a one brief message back to Captain Panaka - who was probably hating her choice to explore the city more than ever now that there was a sandstorm. But the message was hard to hear, because of the storm, and it wasn't informative anyways due to the deception she was trying to pull off. She felt no more comforted about the situation of her world than she did when they landed here.
She'd been given a small glass of water before going to sleep. She'd set it on ground when she was done with it, planning to return it to the kitchen in the morning. But she tossed and turned and finally decided to just use returning it to the kitchen has an excuse.
She didn't expect to find another person sitting at the table.
"Oh, I'm sorry," she said. "I didn't wake you did, I?"
no subject
Date: 2020-07-11 08:31 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-07-11 08:39 pm (UTC)She felt unsure of what to say around Obi-Wan. The things said at dinner seemed quite personal. And from what she'd gathered, Obi-Wan and Master Jinn already knew each other. But not in a way that brought any of them joy to see each other again.
"I'm sorry if my question brought up unpleasant memories for you. I was only trying to understand this place better."
no subject
Date: 2020-07-11 08:42 pm (UTC)He sat back down once they both had the tea, one leg folded under him. It was the truth, really. The 'unpleasant' memories were mostly pleasant, in a paradoxical way, and they weren't her doing.
"I'm sorry about your planet and the delay in getting your Queen to the Senate."
no subject
Date: 2020-07-11 08:51 pm (UTC)"Thank you. I have hope we will find a way to help my home world... Do you mind if I joined you?" She nodded towards the table.
no subject
Date: 2020-07-11 08:54 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-07-11 09:01 pm (UTC)"There's so much about the galaxy that I'm finding I didn't know. I've been off Naboo before, for humanitarian work with my father. And still Tatooine surprises me. How can the Republic just ignore the people in need here?"
no subject
Date: 2020-07-11 09:06 pm (UTC)There is a small pause, before he tries to elaborate. "They are two people, balanced against the weight of Naboo and everyone there. Even scaled to all the slaves on Tatooine, against the need within the Republic and what Tatooine can offer in return--" He shrugs slightly but also sighs, tiredly. "It just isn't worth the resources for them to help when they will get little to nothing back."
no subject
Date: 2020-07-11 09:16 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-07-11 09:18 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-07-11 09:27 pm (UTC)And for a brief second, this probably showed all over her face. But in a breath she'd schooled her features once again.
Indignation right now would accomplish nothing.
"What can I do to help while I'm here?"
no subject
Date: 2020-07-11 09:34 pm (UTC)"Maybe when the situation on Naboo is better, your Queen can remind the Senate that Tatooine is out here. Meanwhile maybe help nudge Qui-Gon out of his tunnel vision. He's always been very... mission focused. Sometimes there are things happening outside the mission that are worth coming back to."
no subject
Date: 2020-07-11 09:40 pm (UTC)"As the Queen's handmaiden, I can assure you she will be appalled by the conditions of Tatooine and will do what she can." When you spoke about yourself like you were another person, it was easy to make those kinds of promises.
But even as the actual Queen of Naboo, the latter task seemed impossible.
"I can try. But I do not know what powers of persuasion you think I have over a Jedi. I may have even exhausted his grace by simply being here. He did not approve when the Queen sent me with him to find a part for our ship."
no subject
Date: 2020-07-11 09:43 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-07-11 09:55 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-07-11 10:06 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-07-11 10:35 pm (UTC)"I'm fourteen." It didn't occur to her that that was might be odd. Children often carried great responsibilities on Naboo.
"Why?"
no subject
Date: 2020-07-11 10:37 pm (UTC)He was more aware of 'child' and what it meant through Anakin.
no subject
Date: 2020-07-11 10:55 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-07-11 11:04 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-07-12 02:42 am (UTC)She chewed over her next question until she'd worked up the courage to ask it.
"Can I ask how you became a slave?"
no subject
Date: 2020-07-12 02:55 am (UTC)In short that was all of it, in a very condensed and frankly sanitized way. More than she had asked for, but he didn't want her to feel like she couldn't asked.
no subject
Date: 2020-07-12 05:38 am (UTC)"I'm so sorry that happened to you," she said. What in this universe was the Republic doing- civil wars with child soldiers? Societies so destabilized they were preyed upon by slavers? What did the senators do in Coruscant if not help the galaxy they'd sworn to serve?
It was quite frustrating to think about.
So she focused on Obi-Wan instead.
"I have another personal question... How is it your fault that you're a slave?"
no subject
Date: 2020-07-12 05:48 am (UTC)He stares at her a moment, and then sighs softly over the rim of his mug. "It isn't, not really. It is something that would not have occurred had I not argued with Qui-Gon and insisted upon staying when he left. As far as he is concerned that makes it some combination of my own doing and the 'Will Of The Force'- he may even consider it just. I need him to help Anakin. Aggressively claiming responsibility for it will get me further than another argument with him - and he isn't entirely wrong, in his belief."
no subject
Date: 2020-07-12 05:55 am (UTC)She did not, however, agree with the Obi-Wan at the very end.
And she was starting to question the judgment of the Jedi, if they would make the conclusion that a slave is partially to blame for abuses done to them.
"Is Anakin's slave master Watto more culpable than the slavers who enslaved you?"
(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From: